North 31

A MAN SETS OFF EARLY FOR WORK

with every good intention and parking his car, catches his thumb in the door handle, so it feels like the nail has been prised up from its bed. He walks away, briefcase in one hand, the other hand raised, thumb held up in disbelief as he waits at the kerb’s edge. A white sports car pulls up, the window slides down and a woman asks where he is thumbing a lift to. Go away, he mumbles, words half lost in his throat, and she, catching only the Away part, opens the door and the man, given the choice, gets in. He looks at her, this woman, whom he would describe as plain if asked, as she asks his name and he decides to stop this, to get out, to go back. Can I explain? he says but at that moment the woman changes gear and the word explain is drowned beneath the thrum of the engine and she only hears Can I which she takes as Kenny. Assuming a new name, being driven without an idea of destination, the man wonders about his wife and conjures up her face, wants to tell her how much he loves her. I love you he says out loud for the first time since he can remember and the woman who is driving slows down, pulls into a lay-by and says, We’ve only just met and this is crazy but I feel the same way too. Stop! he thinks but is now too frightened to open his mouth so says nothing, as she kisses him and kisses him again and tells him about all the pain in life she has suffered, does he know about pain? He nods as he looks at his thumb.

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